Friday, December 9, 2016

Christmas Will be Blue without Him

I know there are other despondent lonely people who are grieving the death of a spouse, so I sent many prayers your way. Many were caregivers to their love ones because like me they wanted to be near him/her as long as possible. Others were not able to be caregivers for various reasons; but they still loved their spouse.

My husband suffered five strokes and he had Dementia. Prior to his fatal illness he was such a sweet caring person who loved me dearly. The ones, reading this if you have never experienced someone with Dementia while dealing with disabling strokes too; then you might not understand fully the stress factor—I know I didn’t know what Dementia and strokes did to the person.

My husband’s strokes affected the part of his brain that finally destroyed his appetite. Until then, I fed him anything that he would eat. I constantly cooked his favorite dishes and he ate well for months; and then about three months before his death in September he stopped eating. He would slap it away or knock the plate out of my hand. The only nourishment he would consume was chocolate Boost. I put a straw in the bottle and tell him it was chocolate milk. He would eat mashed potatoes and ice-cream sometimes, and other time he would slap it away.

I gave him his medication on schedule-- and found he would squirrel (hold) the pills in his cheeks, even though I would ask him if he swallowed the pills; then he would lift his tongue to show me—no pills. I began to find pills in the carpet and on the window sills; so I began crushing them.

The things he hated most were baths, shaves, haircuts, manicures, pedicures and wearing clothes. He got to the point of being abusive by hitting, kicking and pulling my hair. Please remember if this is what is happening in your life; they do not know what they are doing. I had to wear long sleeves in the summer to shop at the grocery store because of the bruises on my arms. He would grab my hand and twist my fingers and push them back trying to break them. I had to take off my wedding rings because he fractures the first bone of that digit and have rings cut off another finger.

When he no longer could sit up by himself---I would pull him into a sitting position to shave and give him a haircut; by straddling him with my legs. I was always afraid he would hurt my leg that was broken twice the same day--in 2014—it has a plate and two screws in it---and I am very careful not to break it again.

My brother-in-law John took all the guns and knives out of his room because he started threatening me with them; it was only words, but it was all new to us so my family tried to protect me. And, I will not lie he made me cry many times; I would walk on the porch to be alone to cry. Yes, I had pity parties, but no one came, but me.

Early in the mornings, he was almost his sweet self for a few hours, I would sit and read to him and he would sleep after any breakfast he would eat or drink Boost. Then, when 3:00 to 4:00 pm came--he would become a different person. He would yell mama- mama loudly—that is what he called me. He also thought I was his employee. I cannot tell you how many times he fired me at night; then in the morning he would tell me about terminating that mean nurse. I tried sleeping in my bed in another room using a baby monitor so I could hear him---most of the time he would stay awake calling me to come there---I got very little sleep and I lost weight because taking care of him was demanding and it consume most of the day and night.

I finally decided to sleep in a recliner outside his room so he knew I was near and it seemed to work better. He still kept his all night yelling and calling me in his room. The doctor increased his medications that made him relax and sleep so that worked for a while. It seemed nothing worked for very long. I seem to inhale with momentarily joy and exhale with disappointment as his medications were changed—promising much, but delivering little.

I was told by many—that I should take time for myself; go shopping, to lunch with friends---to get away for two hours for alone time. (I think of that often now since I am alone---I can tell you it is not that wonderful.) The only time I left him I went to town to buy food and his medicine. My sister Paula or my brother-in-law John would stay with him. And, most of the time if he was not sleeping, he was yelling for me. When I returned home he would chastise me for leaving him and staying gone so long. I never gave up trying to get him to eat—I tried fooling him by going into his room every few hours telling him it was breakfast, lunch or dinner—and a few times it worked.

Our Sweetie Angel my Pomeranian died in March from a kidney disease, he was almost 13 years old---this nearly killed me and I feel he had another strokes at this time because he became worse. He had his last doctor visit in the office and that was a stressful time. My sister helped me get him in his wheelchair to take him to his appointment because he could not stand or walk in April and his eye sight was getting worse. Paula worked so she helped me take him when she could---otherwise I was on my own.

We lowered his mattress because when he could stand he would fall trying to get in bed---it was so high. I have pulled and pushed him onto the high mattress many times. (I cannot believe I am still alive from all I went through---however, I never thought of myself until it was over and I wonder how I did it—I suppose love did it.)

He would roll off his bed, or, fall out of his wheelchair when I left him for a minute, before he was bed-bound I had to pull him into his wheelchair and onto his bedside toilet. The last time he was on his bedside toilet he leaned over and fell off and I called the EMT’s. This year before he passed away the EMTs came to our home at least nine times. I love those guys—they are the best---and whatever they are paid it not enough.

After he was completely bedridden, I used an urinal for him to urinate. And, I used a large pad to put under him for a bowel movement. I turned him on his side which was best because I had better control; and it was comfortable for him. He hated being washed afterwards, but I had to do it while dodging his kicks.

My husband was six feet and weighed 185 to 210 most of his life. When he passed away he was skin and bones and it hurt him to be touched and it broke my heart to see it.

About three weeks before he died his doctor put him under Hospice, because I wrote to him it was time. And, what a blessing this was in more ways than one. I should have done it sooner, and I attribute not doing it sooner to being a little insane at the time. They assure me that I had done everything right and for me not to worry because they were there for both of us. These people are truly Angels. He got a hospital bed which was a blessing even for the short time. He had almost completely demolished his bed by kicking the end, the headboard and the side boards.

His pain became too much even with the powerful drugs Hospice provided for him. His nurse called the Hospice doctor and he was taken to Haven Hospice. He was put in a medicated coma—is how I would describe it and I stayed with him most of the two days and nights he lived as well as my two sisters, Wanda and Paula. This was the time when I needed my family and they were there for me. The ones who could not come called and kept in touch, these were the ones that loved him.

In closing I hope my story might enlighten and give solace to someone who needs it, and know that you are not alone. I am not saying it was easy and although I miss him; I would not want him back to suffer.  My Clinton and Sweetie Angel are together now, and this thought keeps me going forward with my life.

© BEPH 2016 All Rights Reserved
Faith Triumphs Over Cancer: Link Below

Saturday, November 19, 2016

The Pioneer Woman: I am Thankful for You

Only recently did I have the opportunity to view the wonderful, cooking and ranch family called “The Pioneer Woman.” This show became my therapy after my husband passed away. My Angel sister Paula told me about this cooking show, and I have watched it religiously ever since.

Ree Drummond as the Pioneer Woman shares her cooking recipes, her family and their life on the ranch. And, as an animal lover I am so thankful they are taking care of “Wild Horse” on their ranch. People do not realize how valuable the ranchers are to our country by taking in and caring for these horses.

Many wild horses left on their own would not survive the environment or cruelty of inhuman people. This is one time our government did something great as well as the ranchers who protect them under their care, custody and control. I am thankful for all the ranchers who gave them a home.

I am thankful for Ree sharing her cooking skills and different way to change and improve “Traditional” dishes her way. And, I love the opening of the show where the wild horses are running and Ree shows us how much she loves being on the ranch. It is a joy to watch her children in their daily activities as her husband Ladd teaches them how a ranch is operated as his father taught him. These are fine, well-mannered, respectful and happy children.

Ree has to be part Angel to do everything she does as well as making special dishes for Ladd’s grandmother and his parents. She writes cookbooks, display the dishes with her own gift of photography, blogs, home-schools her children, spends time with her family on the ranch helping; and now she and Ladd have a Mercantile General Store in Pawhuska Oklahoma.

This Thanksgiving I am thankful for my family, friends, The Pioneer Woman Show and all the ranchers who are taking care of all the beautifully wild horses.

I told my sister my one desire is to visit the store, and maybe one day it will happen. I am only 18 hours away. She smiled when I told her because she is also a fan of “The Pioneer Woman.”

© BEPH 2016 All Rights Reserved

The Pioneer Woman's Online Shopping at her New Mercantile Store:

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Sharing Negative and Hurtful Words on Social Media is Unwise

Writing negativity about another person no matter their race, religion or political party is non-productive; and displays a person who writes it as being disrespectful and it shows their lack of care and consideration for others.

Americans elected another president to take office in 2017. It exacerbates me to read all the negative comment about our present President Obama and the First Lady and President Elect Donald Trump and his family.

First, their children can read it and making malice statements to cause hurt and pain to somebody is where I place the bottom feeders of our society.

Secondly, the people’s vote is their voice for the future and if all Americans do not join together this time and bring the “American Dream” back---it could our last chance. That means both parties working together without discord, and finger pointing.

Thirdly, stand up for your country, your rights and be respectful of the rights of others. Do not show distain by Tweeting or writing on any social media. Be positive and find a way to share your thoughts that will be helpful and not hurtful to others.

And, remember what our great President Abraham Lincoln said in his “House Divided” speech—United we stand, divided we fall. A house divided against itself cannot stand. And, I add neither can our country if we do not all stand together for the greater good and instilling this into our children to pass on to generations to come.

 A Positive and Professional Office makes a Successful Business: Click Link Below-Thanks
© BEPH 2016 All Rights Reserved

Friday, September 30, 2016

Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton: My Message to Both

Please adhere to the issues that need to be addressed on the next two political debates. Stop acknowledging comments that are only pushing your buttons to throw you off track and making you look foolish and undisciplined---and that is for both candidates.

Address all Americans and stop highlighting different races---we are all Americans who need the same law and order protection, good jobs, better schools with great teachers, hope for the future of the American dream. Unemployed need jobs and all children in American have food each day to nourish their bodies and minds.

Millions are spent on negativity advertisements when the money should be spent on our children of the USA. It seems to me all this money spent foolishly when it could be spent on our American children who are the future of our country.

Are these politicians so high so wealthy they cannot see what is happening to our children who will be leading our country in the future. Will democracy die in our future? Please stop the insanity? Will our country become a third world nation? How does the USA rank in the world on education?

These are very important issues as well as protecting our borders, law and order in our country with well-trained law enforcers. Protecting Americans within our country as well as when they travel.

 Stop playing in the mudslinging---unless you are still unborn or live in a cave without human contract all of this is old boring stuff. Stay on the issue that Americans are concerned about.

© BEPH 2016 All Rights Reserved

Thursday, July 21, 2016

Elect Donald Trump for a Reborn, Safer and Superior Nation

Ted Cruz showed no unity nor finesse at the end of his speech when he did not endorse Donald Trump. He showed a mean spirit and a man who cannot rise above it; instead he prefers to hold a grudge. It is so important for all Republicans to stand together as one party united in order to win this election.

Any, Republican that does not endorse Donald Trump is not a true party member. These people are electing Hillary Clinton and should be drummed out of the Republican Party.

This is our last chance to bring jobs back to our shores for the millions of Americans who need employment in order to live that American Dream, to own a home, and the best education for our children and grandchildren. To be able to save for retirement and enjoy life as Americans who deserve life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

         Look into your heart to eliminate the “Status Quo” or the United States of America will become a nation dominated. Vote for a true leader Donald Trump for a greater America.

© BEPH 2016 All Rights Reserved

Americans Were Sold Out for Money, Power and Greed By Congress: Click the Link Below:

Thursday, June 16, 2016

F.B.I.: Does it Stand for Failing, Bungling and Incompetent?

The news media brings it up time and time again how the F.B.I. knew or was informed about a possible terrorist (s) or sleeper group (s) or red flags pop up on someone buying or trying to buy assault weapons. And, they did nothing about it! I am not saying this applies to every agent because I know there are many excellent men and women who are dedicated Americans that are sworn to protect their country and its people.

I strongly suggest that the Director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, Mr. James B. Comey, Jr. clean house and get rid of the driftwood that floats in the river of indifference just to draw a paycheck. What does he have to say about his agents being notified about concerns from Robbie Abell, co-owner of Lotus Gunworks business about Mateen? I bet they will deny ever hearing from anyone.

What happened to pride and honor of being an agent? This is when the president should consider reprimanding the director and setting new notifications guidelines to share with law enforcement agencies about anyone on the F.B.I. watch list.

Why these agencies cannot share information that will eliminate American being killed in such a senseless manner; is beyond my comprehension. The height of stupidity in our government agencies leaves most Americans shaking their heads.

I feel if someone is put on a watch list---then they should stay there. How many times have we heard about someone being watched and then taken off the list---only then to become a senseless killer?

When will these agencies FBI, CIA, AFT, DEA, USMS (United States Marshals Service) stop sharing their information on a “Need to Know” rule of thumb? They are putting Americans in Jeopardy.  This is what I call “Failure to Communicate Security Knowledge” and any agents proven guilty of this should be prosecuted. And, if found guilty he/she should be denied their retirement.

Security is the big concern of Americans and it is colossal now because some of our American youth have pledged their loyalty to ISIS and/or Al Qaeda to fight against their own families in America. This is the reason that unity should be the top priority for all the law enforcement agencies.

© BEPH 2016 All Rights Reserved

Americans were Sold Out by Money, Power and Greed by Congress: Click the Link Below:

Saturday, May 28, 2016

American Presidential Candidates: Are Mind Changing Candidates Starting to Back Off on Promises and their Platforms?

Is it true that Donald Trump is changing his “Tax Form That Will Make America Great Again” or are we being fed lies and propaganda? Will the middle class receive tax breaks and will more jobs return to our American shores? Or is this another “Alice in not so Wonderful Land Story?”

I believe if the American Companies that took our jobs overseas are to continue receiving tax breaks---they will not care about the unemployed Americans who lost their jobs because of them and Congress let it happened.

As long as the wealthy career Congress members are voted back into office---this country will slowly disappear into a third world country---with no American dream in site. All we will have is the same old brown stuff being shovels from the White House and Congress.

Many Americans are buying their groceries with credit cards which have high interest rates because Congress will not put a limit on the banks to lower the rates for middle class and senior Americans. I live in a rural area of America and I talk to people who cannot find jobs---these people are not lazy and many of them are no long receiving unemployment. They cannot afford doctor or dentist visits; and most are too proud to seek Medicaid. Some still believe what is promised by the presidential candidates as they did years ago and are big believers that God will take care of them.

It is important to do your research on any candidate before you vote. I personally vote for the person not the party because we have seen how a party will not stand united; and how a presidential candidate is not fully support by the party.

It is wise to remember that the wealthy can move to another country and some might already have money in a Swiss bank waiting to leave America if things do not improve after the new president is in office. And, guess what we the middle class, seniors and the poor are left behind to exist with no jobs, no money and no law.

Make your vote count. I know some think we do not have a good choice to choose a new president from; but all Americans do not feel this way. How do you feel? Have you done your research? Can we trust what we are told from the candidate?

I did not just fall off a turnip truck face down into a cow patty; nor, do I believe every word that is shouted from a candidate’s mouth, because their biggest issue will be working with both parties that has never worked together for the people who voted for them.

I believe we should eliminate both parties by 2018 if they do not work together for the hard working and unemployed Americans that need a better life for their families and a good future to look forward as well as leave our descendants a better world.

© BEPH 2016 All Rights Reserved

Americans were Sold Out by Power, Greed and Money---Click Link Below:

Sunday, March 20, 2016

United States Corporate Tax Rate in 2016 is 39.3%

Notice that both the Republican and Democratic Parties are waving to our American companies as they leave the shores of America to take their businesses to another country; with a lower Corporate Tax Rate.

What candidate is running on the ticket to lower the Corporate Tax in America to keep our companies and jobs at home? Who is allowing business genocide in America?

I just heard on the news that Avon is moving its headquarters to Ireland where the corporate tax is 12.5%. It will eliminate 2,500 jobs; hurting American women who make their living as Avon Representatives. This could mean foreclosures, families on the streets, unemployment increasing and children in America going to bed hungry.

Congress and especially the wealthy senators should read, “Government for Dummies” series because it is very simple and I will shout it---LOWER THE CORPORATE TAX RATE IN THE USA---to keep and bring back American companies and close the loopholes.

I am convenience there is “No Common Sense” in Congress and we are sending uncaring, incompetent, with their agenda to fill their pockets bleeding: The America people drop by bloody drop.

I say kick the asinine people out and let the common sense people in. And, here is something to remember, the rich are not affected by unemployment, illegal immigration (they employ them and are served by them in restaurants and hotels) they do not care about the average person because they do not need to work to put food in the babies mouths, pay a mortgage, save for children’s college, all the time trying to afford a decent neighborhood so their babies are not shot from drive-by hoods.

If there is anyone who has not been affected by America Companies moving from our shores it is the wealthy Elite because the rest of us are being pushed to the bottom of the money pole hanging on by the last piece of rope.

Vote in November for the person who will do the most of us the working Americans---not the Elite who can move out of the mess they have made in the USA; and live in any country of their choice. Exiting the United States and leaving the working and unemployed behind as they follow their companies to countries like Ireland with lower “Corporate Tax Rate.”

Due Diligence is what every American should be practicing now in our country by researching each candidate’s résumé and choose the one for the working people that will lower the Corporate Tax Rate that will bring the American Companies home again.


© BEPH 2016 All Rights Reserved

United States was Sold Out by Money, Power and Greed--Click the Link Below:

Monday, March 7, 2016

Donald Trump: The Man Who Elite Families Fear.

Just because most Americans are not wealthy does not mean we are not intelligent savvy researchers. Researchers on what you ask? Americans not only watch the nightly news, YouTube, but they research
and listen to all the opinionated truth-seekers; who are themselves looking for all the facts and truths.

That is why so many Americans are voting for Donald Trump because he answers to no political groups. He stands alone; he tells it like it is without any BS. He is a Billionaire businessman who will not be quiet when he knows how to make our country safe and prosperous again.

What Elite families want to shut him up?  Americans trusted the ones who held positions to keep us safe. Why did we trust governors, presidents, ambassadors, senators, judges and Congress? It could be we wanted to believe that the ones we voted for in the past; cared about America and its people.

Now is the time for a reality check; to see what is ahead for America. Don’t be fooled it’s the Elite not the Constitution that has ruled this country for a long time. Wake-up America and smell the betrayal of wealthy Elite who meet and decide who will be president.

Didn’t you hear on television about how the Republicans are speaking out against Donald Trump? Is it because he is getting too close to all their secrets? Watch the good American Republicans rally around him. You know who they are; keeping watching and researching.


Who is running scared? Donald Trump will clean house shaking out the rugs of lies to find the truth. He will dust out discrimination against all Americans. He is our only truth-seeker that will stand united with Americans.

Watch the ones who enjoy attaching him; and especially the news media and the networks that employ them. He can take it for America and all the savvy Americans should stand up for him. He does not need this job, but he does need America to become a beautiful and prosperous again.

Wake-up American and smell the betrayal of so many we voted to protect us from terrorist. And, they were the ones who were warned time and time again. The information was at their door and they were too lazy to open it. And, they are too rich to care because they can fly to another country to live with all their millions in Swiss Banks.

So be prudent and vote for the man who has America in his thoughts and prayers. He has the courage to speak the truth against evil.

© BEPH 2016 All Rights Reserved
Donald John Trump Sr.'s  Family---Click the Link Below:

Sunday, February 14, 2016

A President Cannot Protect Americans Against Terrorist Attacks Without Excellent Sources Reporting to Him

Do not point your finger at President George W. Bush as having any blame about 911. Click the link below and decide for yourself what agency and other reporting sources were not doing their jobs. These are the ones you can blame.

And, you can also say that a president is only as good as his men and women who briefs him on Homeland Security, FBI, and his close advisors. Having said that I pray the next president will know and demand all the information about an issue; and not leave it to the discretion of agencies or advisors to decide what information should be given.

It is best to research any issues our country has faced in the past before speaking about it unless you were witnessed it in person.

Remember, we Americans, are savvy in our research and cannot be fooled by even presidential candidates blowing smoke and not staying on the subjects we want to hear.

Presidential candidates should not talk about family members of other candidates in their agenda. It
makes you look unprofessional and I never want to hear anything but glowing remarks about Mrs. Barbara Bush. Everyone should have a mother like her who at 90 years old still supports her children.

This is My Truth and Opinion.

Happy Valentine's Day.